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Functional Not Fancy

 

About me.

These days I'm a speaker, consultant and writer.

For ten years, I was editor-in-chief of BtoB, the only magazine devoted to covering the intersection of business strategy and business marketing.

Prior to BtoB, I held senior editorial posts at a number of A-list IT publications, including CMP's [now UBM's] InternetWeek, Mecklermedia's Web Week and IDG's Computerworld.

Added all up, that's twenty-plus years of journalism experience.

Here's my resume. Here's my short bio.

My coverage areas these days include technology in education, healthcare, hospitality, and marketing.

Contact me

Always looking for new assignments. Get in touch: ellisbooker@gmail.com

Funny, right?
Looking for topics deserving of a
humorous spin. Send me a suggestion. 
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Vaccine Card

You never forget your first time. Last night, I was asked to present my completed Covid-19 vaccine card in order to enter a restaurant sans mask. I had the card on me (plus a digital version), and once it was checked against my driver's license, I was able to walk to our table like in the Before Times. The whole process took less than a minute. Honestly, the hostess could have saved a bit of time by scanning the nanochips the government injected into my bloodstream when I got my second vaccine shot, but whatever.

Second Shot

Hoping we don't have to do this routine again in 6 months, and then annually after that. Or, How a Mismanaged Pandemic Became Endemic.

Flight Home

True story from my flight back to Chicago a day ago:
 
Woman in the aisle seat: "I'm sorry, I'm so frightened. I HATE flying!"
Me: "Why? Oh, were you in a plane crash?"
Woman: "No, no. I just hate it."
Me: "Honestly, take off is, statistically, where the problems happen. We'll be in the air in a minute. Relax."
Woman: "You seem to know lots about planes."
Me: "Yes. Well, I've been in three crashes."
Woman: "What! Oh my god. Oh, oh. You're joking."
Me: "Yes, let's go with that. But are you okay?"
Woman: "I almost fainted just thinking about this flight earlier today."
Me: "Awful. Do you faint when you see blood?"
Woman: "I, I don't think so. Why?"
Me: "Because if we crash, there's going to be a LOT of blood."