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Vaccine Card
You never forget your first time. Last night, I was asked to present my completed Covid-19 vaccine card in order to enter a restaurant sans mask. I had the card on me (plus a digital version), and once it was checked against my driver's license, I was able to walk to our table like in the Before Times. The whole process took less than a minute. Honestly, the hostess could have saved a bit of time by scanning the nanochips the government injected into my bloodstream when I got my second vaccine shot, but whatever.
Second Shot
Hoping we don't have to do this routine again in 6 months, and then annually after that. Or, How a Mismanaged Pandemic Became Endemic.
Flight Home
True story from my flight back to Chicago a day ago:
Woman in the aisle seat: "I'm sorry, I'm so frightened. I HATE flying!"
Me: "Why? Oh, were you in a plane crash?"
Woman: "No, no. I just hate it."
Me: "Honestly, take off is, statistically, where the problems happen. We'll be in the air in a minute. Relax."
Woman: "You seem to know lots about planes."
Me: "Yes. Well, I've been in three crashes."
Woman: "What! Oh my god. Oh, oh. You're joking."
Me: "Yes, let's go with that. But are you okay?"
Woman: "I almost fainted just thinking about this flight earlier today."
Me: "Awful. Do you faint when you see blood?"
Woman: "I, I don't think so. Why?"
Me: "Because if we crash, there's going to be a LOT of blood."